tuesdays bite the big one

i thought today might go reasonably well considering technically it's my 'thursday' cause i only have one more work day ahead of me. well, work wasn't all that bad, pretty quiet actually. no it was only when i came home that it got worse. i hit walgreens on the way home to print up a few pics and pick up a few essentials (milk, bandaids, canopy, whatever). BTW, milk is a whole different post....but i digress. i come home and i'm talkin to my honey about my day and what i picked up at walgreens (canopy was only $30!). first of all, he was totally not paying any attention to what i was saying at all. second, he brings home all this crap his mom gave him (who really needs used shampoo?? ick!!). so i'm already getting annoyed. finally i get him to see the canopy i bought and he gets excited cause we'll need it for the fish fry on friday night. okay cool. then he wants praise for cleaning up the garage and all i can give him is 'it's okay but it still needs work'. his idea of clean and my idea of clean clearly do not merge and later on i told him that. and then we get into a discussion about where things should go for the fish fry. we're getting a keg, he wants to put it out back--where we're going to build a fire later! hellloooo! don't think so, alcohol and fire just do not mix! then he wants to completely block off the garage altogether. i said no way we should put the keg in there to keep it cool and i have two other big tubs we're going to fill with ice and bottled water and soda that should stay in the garage as well. just as this starts getting heated up here come the neighbors from across the street to say hi. i knew there was no way i was in a mood to be cordial so i just went upstairs fuming. i hate fighting with him, hate it even more when there's an audience. nobody needs to hear us arguing. later on, he's in bed asleep when i get into my pj's and his snoring is SO FREAKIN LOUD and obnoxious it made me want to scream!!! soo all evening long i've been completely annoyed with him and here's the worst part....he hasn't noticed! so now until we talk about it, or i get enough sleep, whichever happens first, i'm gonna be annoyed. this sucks.

ahhh fridays :)

here it is, friday! my favorite day of the week. has been since i was a little kid, probably because there was no school on the weekends. and now, thank god i have a job where i don't work weekends. whew! dodged a bullet there. my favorite thing about fridays is that i can stay up late (okay so i already do that) but know that i can sleep as long as i want on saturday. :) i don't typically see saturday mornings, not sure i even did when i was a kid. never one to get up early and watch saturday morning cartoons, ya know, back when there was somethin worth watching. as a teenager i used to sleep at least till noon every saturday. looking back i'll bet it was a bitch for my mom to drag me out of bed before that. lol anyway....well, i was sooo tired when i got home cause i had just worked 10 hours straight. then i realized i had to go to the pharmacy, can't miss those b/c pills. oh joy. so i come back home and jason's asleep (gotta work weekends), charlie (my schnauzer) is overly excited i'm home from being gone for 10 whole minutes, and i get a second wind. so i figure, i'm up anyway so i'll post a blog. :)

the world of blog

i decided that the myspace blogging wasn't cuttin it so i joined up with the ranks of real bloggers. lol so i copied and pasted all the myspace blogs that i thought might be of any interest and welcome you to the curiosities of my brain! my reasons for blogging are venting about stupid people (not that i'm any better mind you), talking about wedding plans (cause no one else wants to hear about them), bragging on my puppy occasionally (smartest dog ever), or discussing my fiancee and my lack of sleep. enjoy!

drama drama drama (may 15, 07)

this post was because of some drama at work, they know who they are....

People people people...........grow up!!! Yes, love hurts, life sucks, people are stupid, and there is no such thing as normal. Two words........GROW UP. It happens to everybody. Some of us just choose to quit listening to it, quit bitchin about it, get over it, and MOVE ON. It's called being an adult, and as far as I know all you people on my friends list are (legally) adults. SO BE ONE.

cynical untrusting me (apr 07)

After much debate with myself, I have come to a conclusion, one that I knew many years ago but kept rebuffing in hopes of proving myself wrong. And that conclusion is, there is only one person I can really truly trust in this world, and that is me. Maybe I'm just getting overly cynical and pessimistic as I grow into my late 20s, but that is just how I feel. Don't get me wrong....I love my family to pieces, and I love Jason more than I ever thought I was capable of. I think trust is just a different issue though. As surely as I know how much Jason loves me back, I'm not sure I can trust that he'll ever know how much his snoring bugs the hell out of me, or how I really hate to nag him about things, or how much I wish he was more willing to participate in MY family outings as much as I participate in his. It could be that those are just man/woman differences, or it could be he just doesn't 'get' me as much as I want him to. I don't know. But anyway.....I'm gonna keep rebuffing the notion that I can only trust myself and I hope I do prove myself wrong someday. I don't want to be a cynic forever.

the proposal (feb 15, 07)

Last night while driving home, I tried not to put too much pressure on what day it was, Valentine's Day, because I knew I'd be setting myself up for disappointment. So when i walked in, I immediately noticed there were flowers in a vase on the kitchen table with a card sitting by them. I also noticed how Jason was passed out on the couch. It was dark so I turned on a light, which instantly woke him up. He was a little confused, he hadn't realized he had been asleep for the last 3 hours! I walk over and give him his gift (his very own brand new lunchbox!) and a card and get all mushy and tell him I love him. He says he had a whole idea planned out but he fell asleep, so he hands me my card. It was kinda cheesy and funny at the same time, and on the inside he wrote 'i hope we can spend the rest of them together', meaning Valentine's Days of the future. So just as I'm analyzing what that means he comes over, gets down on one knee and asks me to marry him, to which I respond 'yes!', put the ring on my finger and throw my arms around him in a tight embrace. My eyes welled up with tears, I think his did too. And both of us were hugging so tight we didn't want to let go. It was the most honest and pure act of kindness anyone has ever showed me. I knew there was a reason I was hangin on to him. :)

So there it is, my proposal story. It is now forever immortalized in type. LOL

wanna be old-fashioned (feb 5, 07)

Sooooo I went to this get-together yesterday where I saw a bunch of friends I hadn't seen in, well, quite awhile. I've known them all since high school (some longer). At first I was really nervous about going because I knew many of them were engaged, or married already, and I didn't know what I was going to say about my current situation. So I ask Jason 'what do I tell them?'. And he says 'well tell them it'll probably be this year'. Oh my god!! We talk about wedding plans allllll the time. We talk about where we wanna have it, who will be in it, what kind of reception.....and yet, he still has not formally asked me if I will marry him. Call me old fashioned if you will, but I really want to be asked this question. I need for him to ask me. I'm not going to plan a wedding based on the assumption that we will get married. I need to know absolutely positively for sure that we are. So anyway, this little 'dance' we're doing around the proposal is really starting to eat at me. Everywhere I look there is something on tv about weddings, in magazines, AT WORK! I can't get away from it no matter how hard I try. But, I don't let it consume me. I don't let it bother me, at least not in front of other people, especially those people that actually are getting married this year. I'm not throwing a pity party so everyone will say how sorry they are that I haven't gotten my proposal yet. I'm not gonna rain on everyone else's parade. BUT, I figured if I was gonna vent and let loose a little....this is as good a place as any. :)